When children get the upper hand

28th March: There’s nothing more embarrassing than a speaking child. I say this, as a woman who has recently found out the hard way.

My daughter is only 21 months old, but already she's managing to show me up. Let me explain.

The lovely lady who is my daughter’s childminder goes by the name of Georgina. She is wonderful, funny, warm and very kind. And my daughter – Freya – has started calling her “G-Dog”.

It’s not meant to be an insult. Freya is merely copying her own father, who has a friend called Gary. Gary’s friends all call him “G-Dog” as a bit of a joke. He likes it. He refers to himself as it now. But, the thing is, Gary is not Georgina. And, for a woman to be called, “G-Dog” out of the blue, by a cheeky toddler… well, it’s not exactly ideal is it?

I’m starting to learn that young children are particular live wires when it comes to speaking in public. It’s like they have no filter, to let them know what is and isn’t acceptable in public. They don’t mean to embarrass their parents, they just can’t help it.

Take Jez’s 5 year old for example. They recently went on a family outing, which ended in Jez’s little one asking why a man looking after one of the playground rides, “Had yellow teeth”. Needless to say, the man wasn’t impressed.

It gets worse. On the Heart Wiltshire Facebook page, Tanya got in touch. Her story had us in stitches, but also feeling very embarrassed on Tanya’s behalf:

“When my daughter was 2 and a half we were by the poolside at our hotel in Disneyland Florida. The previous day we had been to Seaworld to see a show of the killer whales and dolphins etc. Whilst by the pool my daughter spotted a very, very large American lady wearing a black and white swimsuit trying to get comfy on a sun lounger. My toddler then yelled at the top if her voice "Mummy, it looks like it’s Shamo come to visit our pool". Really embarrassing, bless her! Sorry American lady.”

Cringe.

Can you beat that?!

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