Wiltshire love lessons for Bond
29th October: When it comes to pleasing a woman, you'd have thought James Bond was the go-to man.
Well think again.
He may have the fast cars, the dapper suits, the champagne and the diamonds, but James Bond isn't a patch on the regular men of Wiltshire. Think about it for a second, all those women he has dalliances with are just fleeting love interests. They're not going to be around when he's old and sitting at home with his slippers. If he wants to get a woman AND keep her, he's going to need to change his ways.
With the help of the women of Wiltshire, we've put together a list of tips that James Bond would do well to take note of.
BEHOLD! The Mr Average Love Tips List:
- Ditch the champagne and make her a cup of tea instead. Without asking.
- Forget the diamonds - get her a practical present that she'll actually use. A fridge, new laminate flooring, new kettle, slippers...
- Cook. Without asking.
- Buy her chocolate. Without asking.
- Never forget to kiss her goodbye.
Somehow I can't see Bond doing any of the above.
Are there any more tips you reckon we should add to the list?