He Says She Says 15/04/10

This week: Is it mean? To leave or not to leave the kids, that’s the party question


He says:

I DJ at all sorts of parties including weddings, birthdays, anniversaries and the like and none of them would be the same without the kids there.

Children are a part of the family and should be able to join in all the celebrations there are.

Everyone smiles as they watch the little kid attempt the Macarena on the dancefloor and you can see that fun being had by all.

The children don’t spoil a party. In some ways I think kids make a party even better. The energy they have is unbelievable and it rubs off on everyone. I’m not sure we’d see ‘Uncle John’ run across the wedding reception and slide onto his knees across the dancefloor if he didn’t have one of the younger family member’s hand to hold!

And a wedding definitely wouldn’t be the same if people weren’t doing that.

I can understand not inviting the children if you are going out for a meal because they wouldn’t enjoy just sitting there.

But a party? Kids enjoy them more than we do! They don’t hold you back from enjoying it yourself and you know that, probably, for the last hour or so anyway, they will be sleeping on the three chairs made into a bed at the side of the hall!

Once you’ve got kids you are a family and families do things together. I for one would take my kids everywhere with me. If it’s a summer barbeque we’ve been invited to then the kids are coming. And if you don’t want my kids there, then I won’t be there either. It’s all or nothing!


She says:

I’ll be honest. I don’t really like other people’s kids. In fact sometimes I don’t even like my own (only kidding Lily..!) so if I was about to have a party there is just no way that I would have a load of kids there.

I know what you’re thinking. Miserable mare! But really, why should I? All they do is make a mess, run about, break things and then get tired and cry a lot.

A couple of years ago my friend got married and was really worried about inviting only me to the service and not inviting my daughter (see apology above!). She thought that I would be upset by this - but I can completely understand why they and others don’t want kids there on their special day.

I don’t think that a wedding is a place for a small child. They don’t want to have to sit through what is a pretty boring service, then have to sit through a formal dinner, trying to pick their way through good they don’t even like – and that’s before the speeches! Kids just can’t keep quiet for that long. And then in the evening when everything is about to get going and you’re ready for a dance with your mates, your little cherub starts rub its eyes and wants to go to bed.

It’s the same for a birthday or a house party. Children don’t need to be there. They just become a distraction for the parents and how can you enjoy yourself while you’re constantly checking to see if your little one is okay or if they’re hanging around you all night because they don’t like the other kids.

How many times do you see your friends leave a party early carrying an over-tired child in their arms? If they’d got a babysitter they could have still been having a good time at the party – not leaving first.

I reckon people think that when they have kids that they have to spend every free minute with them and take them everywhere they go. Well, if you ever get an invitation from me, don’t expect your kids’ names to be on it!


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