Mum bans grandparents from changing her child's nappy to 'protect newborn’s privacy'
29 March 2023, 13:34
A woman has revealed why she doesn't want her in-laws to change her newborn baby's nappy.
A mum has caused a debate after explaining why she doesn't want anyone else changing her son's nappy, apart from her and her husband.
Taking to Mumsnet, the anonymous woman said enforcing these boundaries is all about ‘setting standards early’ when it comes to consent.
She wrote: “I’m very keen on consent and protecting my baby’s privacy and prefer that only myself and my partner are the ones to change DS nappy (six months).
“Obviously, I understand if we’re not available due to nursery eventually or if someone else is babysitting then I’m happy for someone else to do it however this has not yet been the case.”
The mum-of-one went on to say that her ‘overbearing mother-in-law’ tried to change her son’s nappy when he was four months despite not asking for permission first.
“My baby started crying and rather than just give him back decided to take it upon herself to change him (I was standing right there),” she said.
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“He continued crying throughout the change and she gave him back straight after but it annoyed me as it wasn’t her place to change him.
“I didn’t say anything at the time and I was trying to be nice and friendly but starting to find her more overbearing and I’m getting close to drawing a line.”
The mum said that while she knows her baby isn’t in danger, she thinks there should be boundaries when it comes to people holding the newborn.
She added: “It’s not about the baby giving consent it’s about setting standards early the same way I expect grandparents to ask my baby for a cuddle not just go to grab him.
“Young babies have a preference for who’s holding them and I only let people hold my baby when he wants to go to them.
“My baby also doesn’t enjoy nappy changes and I try to make them positive.”
Unsurprisingly, the post attracted a lot of attention on Mumsnet, with many sharing their own opinions.
"If you don’t trust grandparents to change baby’s nappy they shouldn’t be seeing baby. If you do, no issue.
"Babies don’t need consent no matter how keen you are on it."
A second added: "I don’t understand the logic here. If you’re genuinely worried about privacy and consent in these matters, then surely nursery must be a total no go?"
“I think this is something you seriously need to address with yourself,” a third wrote, continuing: "First of all, all my family members have offered to change nappies, and 9/10 it's because they're being helpful and just giving me a tiny break. I think it's a lovely thing for them to do.”