Mum asks if she's being unreasonable for not telling mother-in-law the sex of her baby

30 April 2020, 12:49

The pregnant woman has asked for advice about her overbearing mother-in-law (stock images)
The pregnant woman has asked for advice about her overbearing mother-in-law (stock images). Picture: Getty

The mum has taken to Mumsnet to ask for advice about her mother-in-law.

A mum has asked if she's being unreasonable for not wanting to tell her mother-in-law the sex of her unborn baby.

The unnamed mum revealed that her partner's mother has been overbearing throughout the pregnancy, buying bag loads of unwanted gifts for the child.

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Taking to Mumsnet, she revealed that the baby was planned and that her mother-in-law - who already has other grandchildren - had been excited about it before she was even pregnant.

The mum has been having issues with her mother-in-law throughout her pregnancy (stock image)
The mum has been having issues with her mother-in-law throughout her pregnancy (stock image). Picture: Getty

The mum wrote: "She already got stuff for the baby within a week of finding out even though I've asked her not to. She ignored me and continued to buy things. I told her again thank you but I don't want to her to get anymore things for the baby as my partner and I want to do it ourselves.

"But said if there's anything we really need after that we will let her know and she's more than welcome to buy what we ask for, rather than stuff we don't want or need. She said ok and I thought it was done with."

The mum then added: "Fast forward to a week ago and she asked about my 20 week scan which is next week and said she can't wait to know what we're having as she's bought loads of girl clothes and can't wait to show me. And also has 'plans' depending on the baby's sex. Then proceeded to show my partner the bags stuff she's gotten which he said is several black bags worth. She wouldn't let him look inside thought. I refused to go see as I was annoyed."

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The mum then revealed that she told her partner she didn't want anyone to know the sex of the baby, but that she didn't tell him it was because of his mother. She then said that the mother-in-law was unhappy when he told her a few days later.

The pregnant woman doesn't want to tell her mother-in-law the sex of her baby (stock image)
The pregnant woman doesn't want to tell her mother-in-law the sex of her baby (stock image). Picture: Getty

She added that she had an abusive ex who took control of her previous pregnancy, and that she really wants to have control this time round.

The mum concluded her post with: "So AIBU if i tell my partner and his family that we're not telling anyone but then tell my family what we're having knowing they will keep it a secret?"

Many Mumsnet users rushed to offer advice, with one writing: "I would go down the route of not finding out the sex. I honestly don't think that you can tell one side and not the other."

Another added: "Don't tell anybody at all and by not sharing any details you will be in control."

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